In continuation to Me & You
The moment you felt my pain, the pain disappeared.
-Stinger
Archive for My Perfect World
The Last Day
Since after around 24 hours, I’ll no longer be a single guy, I think I should write something. But I cannot really figure out what I should write.
The very nature of my current thought process requires that they should not be discussed. I really don’t have any philosophical problems any more. So no topic of writing there.
I could write about what I think about marriages and all. But then I don’t want to write anything serious. And then, refering to the paragraph above, I am not gonna talk about anything philosophical anyway.
What I can do is write about my emotions. But emotions cannot really be expressed in words. I can say that “I am happy” and that “I am satisfied”, but these sentences do not show the feelings of belief, and the strength of my conviction. These sentences also cannot express the remarkable fact that I have absolutely no doubt or confusion about this decision. I wouldn’t call it “my decision” because it was divine. Here I am, free from all worries and fears. I am more sure about the whole thing than I am sure about the sun rising from the East tomorrow morning.
Praise is for Allah, who made the man in a beautiful way. He made everyone differently. He instills desires in a human, and then grants them to him so that he can be happy and content. His blessings cannot be matched. He makes a human confident and sure about His ways and blessings. Shaitan becomes jealous and tries to confuse the man. The man becomes uncertain about the truth, looses his conviction, falls into wrongdoings and replaces happiness with fear. The man becomes anxious, and looses respect in his own eyes. But Allah still opens up a way for Him. He asks the human to ask for His help, for His help leads the human back in happiness and contentment.
How can I have any doubts? How can I be double-minded? The evil is not unknown to me. I know it when it tries to shake me. But the nature is prevelent. Nature has a clear voice. The evil speaks in jumbled up whispers. How can I be confused when I can distinct the two voices so well. How can I be afraid when the grand caretaker is there. And we ask for His help to lead us on the beautiful path that He made for us, and to save us from the one who gets jealous.
The Patriot & The Patriot Act
I just wrote the following as a comment on the blog of a patriot American:
Americans fought a war of independence a few hundred years ago. The philosophy of freedom which came with it made America great. But now America is more like their old English emperors themselves. American self-centered lifestyle reflects that of Nazis’ nationalist imperialism. The economic and cultural destruction of the world and American people themselves is worse than economic an cultural destruction of Socialism portrayed by the American TV.
These people are in an absolute denial. They defy their own roots all the time.
I don’t blame the American people. They have been brainwashed. They have been programmed to act in a certain way which is most favorable for their corporates. But they need to wake up.
Burning bodies (of both sides) is the biggest sign God (Christian or Jew or Muslim one) can give you, to tell you that you need to wake up.
Please don’t stereotype me. Don’t make my words irrelevant by saying that this is conspiracy theory shit or anti-American hatred. Just read my words, evaluate for yourself if my words reflect the reality or not. And then do the right thing.
Americans are less than 5% of world’s population, and they consume more than 25% of world’s resources. Actions you take matter.
Complan
“My teacher has told me to drink Complan”, the little boy argued.
“Why don’t you drink plain milk?” Asks his dad.
“But no!” the boy exclaimed with both request and anger, “I drank Complan and it was very tasty”.
“So what if its tasty” said his mother, “Its not really good for your health despite what your teacher has told you.”
“No, no, no” boy with tears in his eyes, “You mix it in milk, and then put in sugar, and then you boil it on the stove, and then it becomes okay. And it is very tasty.”
“Okay, okay, we will get it on our way home.” said the dad.
“That shop on the corner sells it, we can get it from there.” a little happy and satisfied voice said.
I had listened to the conversation and kept it in my memory.
Today, I was in a deep riddle. I have had riddles before, but there was always a way forward. By logical reasoning, I had always been able to know the right way. Today, I came to a dead end. It wasn’t because my logic wasn’t good enough. It was because the solution to the riddle itself required using no logic. But how can one know that he is doing the right thing if he doesn’t use logic? The solution required ultimate trust in God, as much to make sure that I would not feel the need for a logical analysis. Trust of course, cannot be gained with logic. I needed trust to trust Him more. The paradox had me stuck.
And then the conversation above popped up in my mind.
I realized that my relation with God was analogical to that child’s relationship with his parents. I will argue on things which are wrong. I will use my “complan+sugar+milk+boiling” logic with absolute certainty. I will even argue against what God tells me because I don’t understand what He says. But as long as I request Him, and stick with Him, He doesn’t care about things that I don’t understand. He holds my happiness above my sanity. He will delay the lessons for a later time. He is a lot more gentle than parents are to their children. All He cares about is my happiness. Slowly, He will bring me to the right way.
All one needs to do sometimes is just doing what you feel like doing, with the sense of security that God is looking over in every possible way. This gives one the peace and freedom that he yearns.
The only evil is vanity, which dares to provide an alternate caretaker. The only caretaker is God.
My philosophies are my vanity, as they try to provide me with what God is best at giving me. A new life called complan+sugar+milk+boiling awaits me. 
Indifference
Indifference to the evil around oneself is goodness of heart. Indifference to the evil within oneself is ignorance.
Today, people try to know the evil that surrounds them, and ignore the evil within themselves.
When I think of riddles in my life, I find it impossible that any other human being could be free from such thoughts. How can people not think the things I think?
Alas, we are drowning in this sea of irrelevance which has erased distinction between nature and evil.
The Evil That Men Do…
Every human is born on nature. Every human wants to be happy. Pursuit of happiness is the only common ground among people of this world. Unfortunately, people don’t always know what makes them truly happy. When people can’t find answers easily, they tend to buy ideas from others. Therefore, when humans don’t know what happiness is, they become highly manipulatable.
Evil will never present itself as your enemy. It will try to become your best friend. It will provide you with a definition of happiness best suited for its sinister purposes. Since happiness is the most important thing for everyone, you will direct all your efforts towards achieving the happiness as defined by the evil. You will of course never feel completely happy, because the definition of happiness was never correct.
You have to define happiness by yourself. I cannot define it for you, but I can tell you how you need to think to be able to define happiness: Is there a voice inside you which isn’t satisfied with a certain thing in your life? Listen to that voice. It will lead you to happiness.
Note: Its a shame that I have to start from the nut and acorn of the human being. Humans have been programmed to such a degree that no word of advice from generations of wise men seem relevant to the modern world anymore.
What Orwell feared were those who would ban books. What Huxley feared was that there would be no reason to ban a book, for there would be no one who wanted to read one. Orwell feared those who would deprive us of information. Huxley feared those who would give us so much that we would be reduced to passivity and egoism. Orwell feared that the truth would be concealed from us. Huxley feared the truth would be drowned in a sea of irrelevance. Orwell feared we would become a captive culture. Huxley feared we would become a trivial culture . . . In short, Orwell feared that what we hate will ruin us. Huxley feared that what we love will ruin us.
—Neil Postman
The quote is wonderful. But I disclaim complete adherence to Aldous Huxley’s philosophy, since he was associated with the Darwin’s school of thought. The quote should be read in its current context, and not expanded to cover all of Huxley’s ideas.
Smoke Away!
This local corporate believes in burning down all three of Quaid’s principles:
Why Don’t You Comprehend?
The phone rings. An unfamiliar number shows up on the screen.
“Hi, this is XYZ from XYZ bank, how are you doing Sir?” the phone barked.
“Fine” I said coldly.
“Sir, we have noticed that while you are paying your monthly minimum amount, you are not using your card for new transactions” the corporate brightness shrieked through the phone.
“Well I had a pay raise so now I use more cash” I interrupted him with my cold tone.
“Oh, well if you have more salary now, we can give you a limit increase” oh so benevolent chirping sound…
“Nope, its just that I don’t plan using your card much” I said mockingly.
“Why is that Sir?” confused he was, “Are you not satisfied with our service?”
“Well if you want to know, I am not” I sure was rude, “Every month, I end up paying almost 50% markup, when your marketing campaigns give a different impression. I have realized that credit cards are of no help.”
“Sir, I am sorry that you are disturbed, but we charge according to the terms and conditions which you agreed while signing up” he said politely.
“I am not blaming you dear” I said firmly.
“Alright sir, whenever you want any help, we are here for you” he knew he had to give up, “Allah Hafiz”.
“Bye” I hung up.
A few months back, when I had almost replenished the limit of my credit card, the same bank was keeping me on my toes. Every month, almost all of my salary was paid back to the banking system. Almost 50% of my bill amount contributed towards the markup. Since I didn’t have any cash, I ended up buying more on the credit card. And not to mention lack of consideration in budgeting and spending, because well, I had a credit card…
Then I knew that things had to change. And they did! If things go well, I plan to cancel all my credit cards in 3 months time. And things will go well. The nature is prevalent.
The banking systems employ a lots of mathematics and prediction models to calculate different markup percentages of different products for different income groups. These banks prototype you, and other corporates manufacturing consumer goods come to their aid. The whole central banking system is there to ultimately protect the commercial and investment banks on cost of unemployment and rise in food prices.
Why can’t people see? Why can’t people hear? And why can’t people speak out?
The Signs
Many keywords are revolving in my mind.
Killing of the Red Indians… the slaves from Africa… the American war of independence… the founding fathers… rights and freedom… the end to slavery… J. P. Morgan… the Federal Reserve Act… world war I… the great depression… the rise of Hitler… connections between Wallsteet and Hitler… world war II… the atomic explosions… a dummy united nations… the Panama canal… the Amazon forests… Kermit Roosevelt… Marilyn Monroe… J. F. Kennedy… the rise of Hollywood… the Vietnam war… the Shah of Iran… the cold war… the OPEC oil embargo… the end to the gold standard… the rise of credit cards… Jaime Roldos… Omar Torijjos… the Saudis… Zulfikar Ali Bhutto… Moammar Qazafi… the revolution in Iran… Saddam Hussein… the Afghan war… Osama bin Laden… MTV… KFC… Nike… Playboy… the Kuwait war… the Iraq-Iran war… Halliburton… the corporate culture… Fight Club… the dot-com bubble… Hugo Chavez… 9/11… the war on terror… the patriot’s act… the subprime mortgage crisis… the economy based on immediate consumer gratification…
USA has 5% population in the wold and it consumes 30% of the world’s resources.
The whole world is suffering because Americans cannot resist to buy stuff.
USA doesn’t have any real wealth anymore. All the wealth is in Arab and Asia.
Americans are not a proud nation anymore. The spirit of founding fathers is dead. Unless they are high on alchohol, drugs and women; they feel ashamed.
USA is killing innocent people all around the world.
The American people work, work and work. And then they spend. And then they go and drink. But they are not happy. Americans are the most unhappy people in the world.
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A common citizen of USA must :
1. realize that government of USA and the corporate world is doing to him what they are doing to the rest of the world. While this corporatocracy spill the blood of other nations, they suck the blood out of their own citizens.
2. bring the change. He must realize what his lifestyle is doing to African children.
3. realize that his personal ambitions play an important role in success of the sinister corporate world.
4. realize that this life is not a game show. He must find happiness. And happiness isn’t coming with his current lifestyle.
5. realize that he is consuming a lot more resources than people elsewhere. Any change he brings in his lifestyle will help a lot of people around the world.
6. restore the American pride.
7. realize that Americans can do more than anyone else in the world. Since they have the power to bring change, they are responsible for it as well.
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We must bring truth out in the light. While everyone else is being a pessimist about the current situation, I believe that the current mortgage crises is the best wake up call to the world cursed by the corporate world.
Many of us wait for ‘the signs from God’. Well, here they are.
Feminism, Respect & Modern Women
All this shit about women going crazy and demanding dual attitude was going on in my mind. I mean, at one point they demand equal opportunities in the world and professional life. But they refuse to accept the package deal which come with it: more competition, no separate queues for women. They want special treatment and equality at the same time… how is that ever possible?
Another random idea came to my head, and it was about men looking at women as material objects. I won’t contend the fact that men today do infact look at women as items to be possessed and flaunted. Every man today needs a trophy, an award winning woman. But then, women today too don’t have any self respect. They consent to be treated as material objects. If women want respect, they should stop agreeing to become material objects.
Another fact I won’t contend is that men today ogle women at every possible opportunity. But then, women today don’t make any effort to save themselves from those piercing eyes either.
Women today want perfects hubbys. He should earn a million. Most men cannot earn a lot if they don’t resort to some kind of methods where high morals are challenged. With such ways of income come a life style which leads to a shallow character. (I can elaborate on this point if somebody wants)
Feminism appears a strange concept to me. The way I see it, they say: We want equal professional opportunities and social freedom, but we don’t want to face atrocities that men face. We want to dress up and feel good, but we don’t want every guy to look at us. We want a man who ‘can do’, and fulfill our every desire. But we also want him to be a guy who is totally faithful to us. Since all this isn’t possible, then least we deserve is to live life like we want it. We want to enjoy like guys do. We want a handsome man, a stud, cute like a button. We want the fastest car, the biggest house, a designer wardrobe… We want the whole world to appreciate us. We will go out and do social work and join NGOs. We will dine with influencial people, prove ourself to be intelligent.
?
I took it to the extreme, but I needed to do that. I know most women who will read these lines would be of Pakistani/Muslim origin, and they won’t be able to relate to everything that I wrote. But read the initial few lines. If you can relate to even the initial few lines, you need to be cautious now. A journey of a thousand miles starts with a single step. Why take that first step?
Feminism is nothing but another concept created by the corporate world to drown the truth in a sea of irrelevance. What lays at the bottom is misery and disrespect. Don’t go down that road.
Normal?
Being normal is a relative concept. For example, I don’t want to be normal relative to the world today. People like me are destined to have problems. I can simply not digest things around me. My defense system throws the toxic stuff out. So I have accepted myself as a person who is never going to be at terms with the world as it is today.
Doesn’t make me normal, but is a farcry at making me more natural.
The Bad New World
So my family has been looking for a girl for me to marry. That is the way it goes in Pakistan. Families look for their children’s spuces-to-be. Ofcourse I told my mom about what I look for in a girl. My prime requirement was a girl who takes hijab, not just as a piece of cloth, but with its full essence. The other requirements include her being intelligent and well educated, intellectual and open minded etc…
Finding this combination seems to be a problem. See the well educated girls have abandoned hijab. Hijab is left for the poor, uneducated families, not that all uneducated people necessarily take hijab either. Somehow being educated and open minded translates into taking the veil off! What is that? I am angry about it because this bloody directionless education has made sure that I wouldn’t find the right girl. :S
Recently a fellow blogger criticized me in length when I said that the western education is not the right thing for the women of Pakistan. Though she herself belongs to the rare species of educated yet veiled women, she has this impression that this education system would be the guardian angel for the women of Pakistan. Its not!
Coming back to the real topic, i.e. not being able to find the right girl. There are people who are willing to literally sell off their girls. They would flaunt anything that is flauntable. When my mom snubs them harshly, telling them, “We are looking for a girl, not for money” or “Beauty is surface”, they are put off. First they describe the girl as “modern and fashionable”. When my mom tells them that she wants a girl who takes hijab, they retreat to, “Han tu larki shadi ke baad parda shuru kar de gi na” (Okay okay girl would start taking parda after marriage) I don’t need that shit!
I want a girl who has saved herself, who has refused attention because she looks forward to attention of only one guy. That is the essence of parda.
Note: I don’t agree with the definition of the essence of parda I described in the last pararaph. Though at a psychological level, this definition holds true, but this is far from a complete definition. Parda for women is part of their nature. Nature can only go with nature. Hence parda becomes something extremely important for me. (November 5, 2008)
Qeht-ur-Rijal
Where are the men? Where are the men with courage to have their chests ripped apart by the blade of their enemy’s sword? Where are the men with heart to kill another man when they fight for the right? Where are the men who actually believe enough to stand up for it?
Yet more, where are the men who conquered themselves? Where are those who listen to the voice of truth inside themselves? Where are the men with strong will who would do the right thing even when the world doesn’t like it?
These men don’t exist anymore. Rajul means a man, qeht-ur-rijal means lack of men.
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In one of his short stories, Intizar Hussain said that creation of a flour strainer caused the class system to evolve. I very much agree to this. The rich did not want to eat the rough whole flour, and started eating smoother refined flour. Refined flour is required for preparation of the delicacies, the food of the rich.
When you strain the flour so that you are left only with fine white flour, you take out essential nutrition contents from the wheat. Eating fine flour over extended period of time causes malnutrition and excess of estrogen in body. Excess of estrogen causes testosterone levels to go down. Excess of estrogen is directly related to depression, diseases and loss of virility. Depression and poor health eventually lead to dissatisfaction, loss of will power, sadness, infertility, excessive worrying, guilt and fear.
The psychological defense to their fears is to start believing that there is no reason to be afraid, that they are mighty and will not be resurrected. Hence the excessive worrying, fear and sadness causes most to loose their religious beliefs. They don’t see God’s hand in anything. Everything seems only logical. Life seems absurd. Atheism comes in. Science becomes God.
Since they think there is no hereafter, life is overemphasized. Having a “perfect life” becomes more important. The distinction between right and wrong becomes meaningless. Fulfillment of instincts becomes more important than doing the right thing.
Even if they do realize what is right, they might not actually do it because of the lack of will power.
For this fulfillment and a perfect life, people set certain goals. Perfect physical appearance, wealth, fashion, personality and style and what not…
Now think: If you don’t let such a person fulfill his instincts, his life will become miserable. To fulfill his instincts, he will do anything! He will pay you to have a perfect life. He will pay you for any stupid thing which he thinks is important for his life. Since a man cannot possibly have everything he wants, he will be stuck in the vicious cycle of sadness and temporary happiness he gets by spending money on things he thinks he wants.
Now look at the world today. We have processed foods in plastic containers which are extremely high in estrogen content. People today have higher levels of estrogen levels than ever before. This leads to lack of testosterone which then leads to a host of physical and psychiatric problems. As explained above, the person goes through the vicious cycle. The corporates running under the capitalist economy create all the foods high in estrogen contents. Corporate sector then makes the medicines for all the new fancy diseases. Corporates make cosmetics, designer clothes, and all other things to pamper a human’s instincts. Corporates run media to show you all the californication. You join the missing links. The corporate world is the biggest supporter of science. They are the ones making fun of religions and beliefs.
So today, people have bad health, weak beliefs, they are depressed and worried, they want to have a perfect life and they earn to buy stuff which make them only temporarily happy. All good for capitalism and corporate culture!
If people would stick to basic unprocessed foods, there would be no corporate culture!!! They would be happier, healthier and would be strong in beliefs. All these things simply go together.
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So how can we have men anymore? Real men don’t exist anymore, thanks to capitalism, atheism and the american dream.
Note: Definitely a phenomenal post. This post is from the initial phase of my attempts to theorize why humans cannot be happy. This post was a huge step in the right direction. Though this post might seem only political, this has everything to do with my life, beliefs and feelings. (November 4, 2008)
Tum Hi Tu Ho x_x
So I had a Ufone T-shirt with me for a while which all company employees were bestowed with. I hated it because it had Ufone’s orange logo on it. On the back, even the brand slogan “Tum Hi Tu Ho” is written. Since I couldn’t wear it to anywhere else, I decided to use it for the morning runs I do.
Now I’ve been getting some extra attention from other people on the track since the day I started wearing the shirt. Many times, when I over-take someone on the track, I hear them reading out loud the words written on my shirt. So after every few yards, I get to listen to the dreaded words “Tum Hi Tu Ho”. x_x
Nahin hoon! and why do our people have to say such stuff out loud? :s Last thing I want to hear first thing in the morning are the words “Tum Hi Tu Ho” :s
Great War
A friend at work was going through my blog, discussing stuff with me, and I kept mentioning my depression again and again. That is when he said, “Depression na ho gaya, world war ho gai“. (Its just depression, not a world war.)
That reminded me of this quote from Fight Club:
We don’t have a great war in our generation, or a great depression, but we do, we have a great war of the spirit. We have a great revolution against the culture. The great depression is our lives. We have a spiritual depression.
-Chuck Palahniuk, Fight Club, Chapter 19
Shit Hole
This blog is my shit hole. Whenever I feel bad, I come and write something here. When I am happy, the blog seems meaningless. Why is that bad? Its bad because now I have a whole time line of my bad times, and there is no record of my happy times.
Note: This is true that I only wrote about bad times. But when I read my blog from beginning till end, I saw a pattern. Everytime I thought that I saw things more clearly than before. Many times, I exclaimed that I have reached to the end of all realizations and that the end isn’t so bad. But things kept evolving, making this blog not just a memoir of bad times but a record of evolution of my thought process as well. (November 4, 2008)
Diversity
If logic and science really did explain everything, every human would be the same. Humans are different. The diversity itself is the biggest proof that there is a bigger power.
What has this atheist/capitalist behavior given us? Now everyone wants to be “different”. Idiots!!! You already are different! The only thing common in all of you is that all of you want to be rockstars! And the desire to be “different” makes you just like everyone else!
This is the big experiment of the capitalist bosses! Make everyone the same so that they are easier to control! Come on people, open your eyes!
Female Rights
Women: I am a deer and my stomach can only digest grass and leaves. But if I want to feed on flesh, its my right to try it. You men have no business telling me what I should and shouldn’t eat.
Men: Hey women, men are tigers, and we are meant to eat flesh. We don’t insist on eating grass do we? We know we can’t digest it so we leave your job to you. Why don’t you accept your role too?
And about “equality of genders”: Tigers aren’t superior to deers! Its not about superiority, its about accepting the role God gave you! Tigers are strong, but aren’t cute like deers! Deers can run for hours, tigers tire out in a minute! Tigers and deers can’t be compared!
Women and men are not equal. At somethings, men are better. At other things, women are better! Be natural!!! And no, women cannot do everything a man can! And similarly, a man cannot do everything a woman can!
This female right and feminism is just a stupid offspring of our capitalist world. Realize it!
Note: The sentence “women and men are not equal” should be replaced with “women and men are equal but not identical”. (November 4, 2008)
Moving On…
May be you do realize the problems better when you are desperate. But the solution doesn’t lay in desperate measures. One needs to be over and above the depression to set things right.
Sometimes, the depression itself is the biggest obsession we have.
Note: This was a phenomenal post. The words above proposes the ultimate self improvement method. The rule has implications in correcting not only depression, but all psychological troubles. The root cause of all sadness can be related to a human’s obsession with an idea. Handling the idea at an intellectual level is not the solution, but being indifferent from the whole idea itself leads to freedom. (November 4, 2008)
Culture vs. Capitalism
Kuldeep Nair was in dad’s office a few weeks ago. Dad asked him about social changes in India. Among other things, he mentioned that “Sikh youth have stopped keeping kase* because girls don’t like them”.
This disturbed me. Why the hell would a guy stop following his culture and traditions because girls don’t like it? And why the hell wouldn’t girl accept a guy’s culture?
Social behavior of people living in different parts of the world is changing. Change is natural. I’m not against change. But I am against the changes being directed by evil powers with an agenda!
If you look closely, people around the world are now developing dreams similar to the so-called American dream: A lifestyle most suitable to corporate culture and capitalism. This transition is not natural. It is very strategically being forced upon people around the world!
Life is happy when people live it naturally. Since the change is not organic, life feels so artificial these days. I hate it!
I refuse to change because some mean people of the world want me to change. Revolution starts from this refusal.
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* Kase are beard and head hair which Sikh men grow as a part of their religious and cultural practices.
